Bhavya and Deep
In this inspiring story you will witness the importance of a sibling’s support:
Backstory:
Bhavya is Deep’s supportive sibling, who is 6 years older than he is. When their mother was pregnant a milkman pushed her, she went to a gynecologist, but nothing appeared to be wrong and the pregnancy continued as planned and he was born with no external indications that something was wrong. However, one day after her brother was born the two of them were taking a picture and Deep grabbed onto Bhavya’s hair, with his arm in a 90 degree angle, and wouldn’t let go. It was at this moment that the family realized that something was different about their child. It was then discovered that he had a minute blood clot on the right side of his brain.
How was her life like with a special-needs sibling?
Bhavya considered herself to be very lucky to have a sibling as exceptional and special as Deep. While going to his physical therapy she felt lucky to be able to help others like her brother, however, she did feel helpless sometimes to see so many kids struggling. Additionally, she never felt shameful of her brother, in fact, she was proud of having such an exceptional sibling. Many times she felt as though she had to give the world an example of how to act around people like her brother. The word handicap is commonly associated with a negative connotation, but she believes that no one is handicapped and, instead, everyone is unique. Bhavya believes it is more about perspective and the lens you look at it from.
How is her life right now with a special-needs sibling and what is her relationship with them?
She recently moved to the US and enjoys being a Spanish teacher. As of right now, her brother gets a ton of support from his family, like many families they're his backbone. For example, they are always there to support him and protect him. A lot of Bhavya's friends were also Deep’s friends because at school it was quite difficult for him to make friends and whenever he experienced a challenge or was being bullied by someone else she was there to step in and support him and speak up for him like an exceptional sibling. She found it very difficult to move away from her brother after her marriage, but he fully supported her and the words that her mom said to her and the conversation and support that she had with her mom was very influential in her decision to come to the US.
Did her parents affect her relationship with your sibling? If so, how?
Luckily in her case, Bhavya’s mom was very supportive of her and Deep. She was very protective of him and as of right now she still is as he is experiencing more freedom she's still being a protective mom just as I've seen with my friends and with other people. Furthermore, she describes the special attention that her mother had for her brother but she realized that it was needed as he had more unique needs and a more challenging time at school.
What challenges did she face having a special needs sibling? For example, how does her special needs sibling affect her relationships today?
She felt a lot of anger to the other people who made it their duty to make fun of her brother and call him such things as “langda” which means no legs. She always spoke up for her brother and defended him against these bullies. Additionally her husband has a special relationship with her brother that brings her joy to watch.
How did she overcome these challenges?
Support from her family and acceptance of her situation and how to make the best out of it and protect her brother. For example, many times people will question the whole family about Deep’s condition in front of him. Bhavya feels confused and frustrated, because if someone has a question the least they should do is ask privately not in front of her brother.
What was a challenging experience with her sibling?
The most challenging experience was to decide whether to get married with a her husband or not. Her mom made sure to support her decision. During their 6 month anniversary, Deep was very happy and supportive of her decision and she felt proud that he would take care of himself with the support of his family.
